At some point in life, usually during a suspiciously “deep” conversation, someone leans in and asks:
“What are three things you couldn’t live without?”
First of all, this question is a trap.
It’s the philosophical cousin of, “If you were stranded on a desert island, what three things would you bring?”
Oh, I don’t know – maybe WiFi, a yacht, and a lifetime supply of pizza? But fine. Let’s pretend we’re being realistic.
After extensive self-reflection (and by that I mean scrolling), here are the three objects I truly cannot live without.
Grab popcorn. This is about to expose me.
1. My Phone
(Because I’m 72% Human, 28% Battery Percentage)
Let’s not pretend here.
If I leave my house without my phone, I do not “forget” it.
I experience emotional collapse. My phone is not a device. It is…
My GPS (because I somehow get lost in my own neighborhood)
My therapist (via inspirational quotes I screenshot but never reread)
My entertainment system
My alarm clock
My social life
My camera
My notes app where I write “important ideas” like: Buy cilantro. Google why cats stare.
Without my phone, I am a confused Victorian child wandering into traffic.
And the scrolling. Oh, the scrolling. I open it to “check one thing.” Two hours later…
I’ve learned how to make sushi. I’ve watched a documentary on the emotional history of pasta. I’ve read 47 comments debating whether pineapple belongs on pizza. I now have strong opinions about something I didn’t know existed 90 minutes ago.
Time? Gone. Productivity? A myth. If my phone dies, I don’t panic. I reflect on my life choices.
2. My Coffee Maker
(The Appliance That Prevents Me From Becoming a Villain)
There is a version of me before coffee. We do not speak of her.
Morning without caffeine is a horror genre. My alarm rings and my brain whispers,
“No. We will not be participating in today.”
Enter… the coffee maker. That blessed machine gurgles like a tiny domestic hero preparing salvation. The aroma alone revives 3% of my personality. And then comes the first sip.
Angels sing. The fog lifts. My soul re-enters my body. I blink with intention.
Coffee doesn’t make me energetic. It makes me civilized. Without it, I am googling “How to survive on vibes alone” while aggressively searching for the nearest Starbucks.
Coffee says, “You can do this.”
My anxiety says, “Let’s do everything.”
And together, we conquer the day.
3. My Pajamas
(Because Comfort Is Not a Luxury. It Is a Lifestyle.)
Let’s be honest. Society wants us to “dress for success.” But my soul wants elastic waistbands.
There is nothing, and I mean nothing, more sacred than the ritual of changing into pajamas. It signals that the world no longer has access to me.
Fancy clothes are a performance. Pajamas are truth. Whether it’s that ultra-soft pair from Colors that feel like a gentle hug, or that ancient hoodie that has survived more seasons than a Netflix series, these garments are emotional support fabric.
I have canceled plans for less. Pajamas are warmth.They are safety. They are, watching Netflix like it’s research, thinking deeply about life while horizontal, “Resting my eyes” for three hours.
And let’s admit it, no one wants to put on real clothes. We do it because society insists. If productivity had a uniform, mine would still have drawstrings.
Honorable Mentions (Because I’m Not a Monster)
My Refrigerator, guardian of pizza rolls. Protector of leftovers I swore I’d eat tomorrow, keeper of that mysterious jar of pickles I refuse to throw out for emotional reasons.
My Bed, the true headquarters of my existence.
I sleep there, I overthink there, I watch shows “just one more episode” there, I plan my entire future there.
Honestly, my bed deserves equity in my life.
So, there you have it.
My three essential objects:
A glowing rectangle.
A caffeine machine.
And a pile of soft fabric.
Minimalist? No. Honest? Absolutely. Here’s to staying caffeinated, comfortable, and perpetually one notification away from distraction. Because what is modern life if not chaos – beautifully wrapped in WiFi and fleece?
Now if you’ll excuse me, my phone just buzzed, my coffee needs reheating, and my pajamas are calling me home.
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